Ways to Communicate in a Semi-Open Adoption in New York
Choosing to have a semi-open adoption can give you a sense of peace after placement. You won’t be left wondering how your child is doing later down the line or if the adoptive family is taking good care of him or her. If you don’t want face-to-face time, no need to worry! There are plenty of ways to communicate in a semi-open adoption.
Part of your adoption plan will include the different types of communication you’d like to use to keep in contact with the adoptive family and/or your child throughout their life. We have years of experience with semi-open adoption and if you have any questions contact us at Adoption Choices of New York.
Semi-Open vs. Open Adoption in NY
Though both adoption choices have a variance of communication between the birth mother, adoptive parents and the child, the big difference between the two is facilitation. In semi-open adoptions, communication is handled by a third party. More often than not, it is handled by the adoption professionals that helped throughout the entire adoption journey. Through our adoption agency in New York, we use a secure, private online portal called ChildConnect.
Having a third party involved in communication ensures you, as the birth mother, and the adoptive parents have clear boundaries so both parties are comfortable. Of course, communication is discussed and decided before placement, so you’ll have a plan laid out before you give birth. No need to stress about what communication will look like. You’re in the driver’s seat and have full control during the adoption planning process.
Adoption Communication through the Adoptive Family
Communication can be given strictly by the adoptive family if you’re not comfortable communicating directly with your birth child. One of the many ways to communicate in a semi-open adoption is through handwritten letters. Written communication is a great way to receive descriptive information about your child’s life, their growth and any other details the adoptive parents and you decided on sharing. Letters can be monthly, annually, or sporadic. Letters are a tangible item that can be saved throughout your child’s life and serve as a reminder that your selfless decision allowed them to have a wonderful, happy life. You can write letters back to your child for them to read when they’re older too.
Email updates, texts and pictures are another form of communication that can be done solely through the adoptive family. Similar to the letter option, the frequency of these updates are decided upon by you and agreed upon during the adoption process. Some days are going to be harder than others, that’s just how life goes for everyone. Having control over where and when you view the updates on your child allows you to navigate the information when you’re in the mental headspace to do so with a positive outlook.
Adoption Communication with Your Child
Semi-open adoptions do allow for communication to be performed between you and your child. Any form of communication will always be facilitated through the adoption professional, but your child, once they’re old enough, can write their own letters or updates. Video calls or phone calls can be another form of communication that can keep you in the loop and feel connected with your child without overstepping pre-discussed boundaries.
Communicating with your child gives him or her the option to ask any questions they may have about your or their adoption story. You can have a bond with your child without severing or dampening the connection they have with their adoptive family.
Benefits of Semi-Open Adoption in NY
Having a form of communication comes with benefits that spread out through the child, yourself and the adoptive parents. Your child won’t be stuck wondering about their birth parents or biological family. Cultures, stories and traditions can be shared with your child giving them a sense of connection. Identity is a big part of a child or teenager’s life. Giving your child the benefit of learning about their adoption and their backstory in a positive light will give them the foundation to be proud of their adoption story.
Communication between you and the adoptive parents means that medical history can be shared with ease. If there is anything the adoptive parents need to look out for, regarding the child’s medical wellbeing, they will have the information right away. Family health records will be beneficial for your child later on if they want to start their own family, or when they move out and are responsible for their own health as adults.
Semi-open adoptions are structured to ensure the roles of the adoptive parents and birth parents are not intermixed. The handling of communication by a third party, in addition to the given boundaries, make it clear on both sides how any form of communication will be conducted. This gives the child a sense of structure from the beginning.
When to Choose a New York Semi-Open Adoption
Everyone’s adoption stories are different. Birth mothers have all of the control while planning their adoption journey. Semi-open adoptions are a wonderful choice for birth mothers who want to be involved in their child’s lives, but feel more comfortable having guidance during times of communication.
If you’re still considering semi-open adoption, we can answer any questions you have at Adoption Choices of New York. Adoption Choices of New York is available to assist with your adoption plan. Call us, text us, email us; we are here for you!
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