Self -Care Tips For New York Birth Mothers Considering Adoption During The Month Of May
Annual Mother’s Day celebrations are different for each and every birth mother. No matter the length of time it’s been since placing your child, Mother’s Day can be a hard day to get through. Regardless of communication done through open or semi-open adoption, there can still be negative feelings towards Mother’s Day, and that is perfectly acceptable. Every birth mother has her own journey and experience. How you feel is completely valid no matter what other people think. Remember, you matter too, and we are always here to help. Contact us at Adoption Choices of New York. Let’s talk about some self-care tips for New York birth mothers considering adoption during the month of May.
Self -Care Tips For New York Birth Mothers
Speaking With A Counselor
A great service provided for you at all times during and after the adoption process is access to counseling. Group or individual counseling can be incredibly beneficial after placement or throughout the adoption journey. May can be a hard month emphasizing what society perceives a mother to be and advertisements with children spending the day with their mothers. Adoption does not sever the emotional bonding between you and your child. The choice was made out of love, and it is okay to feel upset, discouraged, and even guilty at times during May. Trained professionals who have based their careers on helping birthmothers navigate through the tough times after placement can help you manage— especially if it is your first Mother’s Day after placement.
Take A Social Media Break
Avoidance isn’t always a negative response. Sometimes it’s just easier to avoid reminders for your own mental health. Spending the day reading a book, watching your favorite shows, or just spending time with the special people in your life can be enough to fill your day and keep you from scrolling. You can block specific hashtags and advertisements, but there are a few that slip through. If you feel yourself getting too worked up over posts or any Mother’s Day related on social media, set your phone down and walk away for a few minutes. Find another activity to take your mind off it.
Make It Special For You
One of the most critical parts of your adoption journey as a birth mother is selecting the adoptive family for your child as a birth mother. In open and semi-open adoptions, communication between yourself, the family, and your child is agreed upon prior to placement. Making plans to communicate, physically or otherwise, on Mother’s Day will give you something to look forward to. Your own personal celebration. Make it a unique, meaningful day. Starting at a tradition of writing a letter to your child or receiving a photo can turn a stressful time into something positive.
Write In A Reflection Journal
Mother’s day is an annual celebration and will be something you have to go through each year, but it can help you process your feelings. Each year you may feel something different when the time comes. Your relationship with your child may have changed. There could be less contact or more contact— things in your life will have changed too. Reflecting on how you feel by either free writing or outlining what you want to explore can help process and release the emotions that come by each year. You may even discover those feelings are more than just a yearly occasion. Dealing with the wave of emotions that can hit you after placement is incredibly important for your mental health and well-being. Journaling as a self-care tip for birth mothers in New York considering adoption during the month of May can also be used as a consistent self-care tool too!
Allow Yourself To Be Annoyed Or Withdrawn
The time of healing after placement is a sensitive one that differs from birth mom to birth mom. There are moments where everything may feel calm, and then suddenly, the reminder of pregnancy can stir emotions up in a negative way. All emotions during this time, especially around Mother’s Day, are valid. Let yourself feel angry or annoyed or sad. Bottling up emotions is incredibly dangerous to your mental health. You matter just as much as your child. You are a person, a mother, and a strong woman who doesn’t need to feel any certain way around Mother’s Day. Let yourself feel and take the time you need to process, no matter what anyone else says about the matter.
Taking Care Of Yourself As A Birth Mother In New York During May
One of the wonderful things about going through the adoption process in New York is that you’re not alone even after placement. Do you still feel unsure about what to do or how to handle the stress of Mother’s Day? Contact us at Adoption Agencies of New York so we can help you through this complicated time of year. You are a mother who matters just like all the other mothers that are being celebrated on May 9th.
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