You’ve decided to adopt. That’s exciting news! A very important first step in your adoption journey, and to growing your family. You’ve no doubt started to research the available options, and get a bit more educated about the process itself, but you’re still wrestling with the benefits and potential drawbacks of your decision.
Don’t worry — you’ve come to the right place! Believe it or not, weighing all the pros and cons is an important part of the decision making process. It’s perfectly ok and natural to carefully consider the many facets involved. Not only does this show that you are dedicated to the journey, but it also speaks volumes to your future as a good parent. Read on to gain insight into some important factors of parenthood, and the life of your future child. Please know this is not a complete resource.
To begin, let’s get the cons out of the way first.
Cons of Same Sex Adoption
- Discrimination – despite the leaps the government has made, there is still room for more growth and a deeper sense of acceptance. Until that happens, though, unfortunately discrimination continues to thrive. Thus, your child may be subject to bullying or ridicule at school.
- Psychological Factors – some statistics show that teens raised by LGBT parents may have higher rates of depression, drug abuse and suicide than those raised by straight parents. These facts alone stop potential parents in their tracks. Yet, it’s important to remain hopeful, positive and realistic.
- It’s Hard Work – not everyone is cut out to be a parent. The idea of having a child always overtakes the reality of it. Once your child comes home, you can’t give him or her back at the end of the day. You have to be dedicated to them every step of the way.
Now for the positive side of things.
Pros of Same Sex Adoption
- A Loving Home – as prospective parents, you have the opportunity to open your hearts and home to a child who desperately needs it. To ensure that they are never orphaned or feel unwanted. You get to enrich their lives with meaning, warmth and love.
- You Get Your Family – adoption grants same sex parents the gift of a child, who they couldn’t otherwise have. Whether you are single, or are unable to conceive, adoption helps make your dream of parenthood come true.
- It Changes Your Life – growing your family through adoption is a life-changing journey. It’s both rewarding and challenging. Through domestic infant adoption, you get to experience the joy of bringing home a baby, and raising him or her from the start of their life. From there, you get to watch them as they grow, and raise them as your own.
- Your Children Will Embrace Diversity – you will be able to raise your children in a home that embraces diversity and provide your child with the support they need to face close-minded people they might encounter in the world.
- Openness in the Adoption – prospective adoptive parents can see this both as a pro and con. While the easy access to your child’s medical and health records is appealing, staying connected to the birth family might not be what you have in mind. For this aspect of your decision making, be sure to reach out to your adoption agency or lawyer to discuss what best fits you and your ideal family.
Weighing the Pros and Cons
Adoption is all about creating your family. It will change your life in the best way possible, and present you with learning curves every step of the way. To better help you through the pros and cons stage of your adoption journey, consider these questions: what are your true motivations to adopt? Why do you want to be a parent?
Think through these carefully. Be transparent and honest with yourself, and your partner. You may find that answering these helps you find the response you already know deep down.
Adoption Choices of New York
For more information on adoption or if you are currently in the process of adopting a baby and have any questions or concerns, feel free to contact, Adoption Choices of New York.
Support Adoption Choices
Adoption Choices, Inc. is partnering with Crowdrise, a fundraising website for nonprofits, to help our adoptive parents and birth parents with much needed financial assistance. We understand that expenses keep clients from fulfilling their dreams. Both with birth parents making a plan for adoption, and with adoptive parents growing their family. It is our mission to provide financial assistance through grants and scholarships, awarded annually in November, in honor of National Adoption Month. Funds assist adoptive parents with matching and placements, adoption finalization and helping birth mothers improve their lives through higher education — and much more.
However, we can’t do it alone. Please read up on our programs and donate if you are able. Your donation will make a huge impact.
About the Author
Rachel Robertson is a published journalist, book editor, certified Publishing Specialist, and aspiring novelist. She graduated from Central Washington University (CWU) in March 2018, having found her writing voice within the Creative Nonfiction genre and grew to work as a freelance book editor for small presses all across the United States.
In June 2018, she embarked on an internship with Virginia Frank and came on board with Adoption Choices Inc., Not for Profit 501(c)(3), in December 2018. Between her mutual passion with adoption and surrogacy, and her own personal history with adoption, Rachel is excited to research and share topics each week that will spread awareness and better serve the faithful patrons of Adoption Choices Inc.
When Rachel isn’t haunting her local Starbucks or Barnes and Noble, she’s avidly pouring over her Writer’s Digest subscription or cozying up with a cup of tea and book. She currently resides in the beautiful Pacific Northwest with her beloved wife and Border Collie.
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“Gay Parenting Pros and Cons.” Planting Seeds: Parenting Blog for Moms and Dads, Planting Seeds Parenting Blog, 3 June 2014, plantingseedsbook.org/gay-parenting-pros-and-cons/.
Thegayadopter. “Our Top 10 Pro’s & Con’s of Adoption.” The Gay Adopter, The Gay Adopter, 18 Oct. 2016, thegayadopter.wordpress.com/2016/10/19/our-top-10-pros-cons-of-adoption/.