Pros and Cons of Closed Adoption in New York
Closed adoption may not be that widely regarded as far as adoption studies go, but time and time again has it proven to be the right choice for birth mothers all across the country. The advantages it brings to birth mother, child, and adoptive parents are sure enough to count, but, of course, it has its disadvantages as well.
There is no “perfect” adoption plan, but that does not stop us from wanting to achieve it. Adoption Choices of New York works tirelessly to bring a birth mother’s wishes to life when she makes her adoption plan, be it with open, semi-open or closed adoption.
We are going to take a look at some pros and cons of closed adoption for you to let you determine whether or not this type of adoption is the best option for you and your child.
The Pros of Closed Adoption in New York
- Privacy and anonymity. One of the most attractive things about closed adoptions is that it has the most amount of anonymity out of all the adoption options. There is no information exchanged between the birth mother and the adoptive family when the adoption process begins. Everything is kept confidential.
- Distance from personal circumstances and the adoption process. Closed adoptions rank favorable for birth mothers who are looking for a clean and precise disconnect from their adoption situation. Life throws us many curveballs. An unplanned or unexpected pregnancy can certainly be one of those. Being unprepared for something as big as that really can take a toll on your physical, emotional, and mental states. Getting away from it all helps to piece together those remnants of control you felt you may have lost during the pregnancy.
- Closure. Having such a distant and quick parting from the adoption process can be exactly what a birth mother needs. If her pregnancy experience has been anything but peaceful, she may want to get it over with ASAP. Negative feelings and emotions that are associated with the pregnancy can be easily taken away with a closed adoption and seen as completely washing your hands of the situation.
- Peace of mind and ease moving forward. Having a closed adoption can help alleviate any harboring stigma the birth mother may be feeling about her adoption. Depending on her situation and the various factors leading up, it can be a relief to finally put it behind you and move on with your life.
The Cons of Closed Adoption in New York
Though we discussed the main advantages and positives of birth mother, there are adverse ones to those as well.
- Grief and sadness. One of the most common symptoms or outcomes of adoption is that birth mothers may experience a large range of grief or sadness. Their aftermath of the adoption process can be an arduous one or they may have second guesses of their decision. Closed adoptions are so quick and distant it can definitely add to that sadness or even amplify it.
- A sense of denial. That window of grief either widens or becomes stronger based on the conditions surrounding it. Borne out from conditions can even be a sense of denial. A sense of denial of the whole adoption process being made and finalized, or that it even took place. So many mixtures of negative emotions can fill that large window of grief created out from that closed adoption.
- No contact with your child. On top of your own disadvantages you face as the birth mother, there are some even your child may experience after the adoption has been cleared. Children are naturally curious and inquisitive, they wish to learn about things, ask questions why they are the way they are. Family history is certainly nor spared from it. If you are not around to provide those answers or give any closure to those lingering inquiries, it can lead to some issues of identity for your child. They want to know their heritage, their place of birth, what kind of people they come from.
- Unanswered questions for you, the child and the adoptive parents. It leaves an awkward situation for the adoptive parents because they do not have all the answers that the child is looking for. With so little information exchanged, so little details passed between the two parties, it can create some tough conversations that lead to possibly unanswered questions.
Is Closed Adoption in New York Right For You?
Research is always key to finding out what is best for you and your baby. Learning the pros and cons of closed adoption and the intricacies in them all will be essential in making the right choice. Closed adoptions are nothing to be ashamed of or feared. It is your choice and your right! Visit our blog page for more information.
Meet the Author: My name is Alexander Charles Cooper, I come from a family of four that originates from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I, along with my younger brother Greyson were born in North Carolina, three years after my parents had wed and moved to the state. My birthday is April 4th, 2000, which is where I draw my lucky number four being from. I share that birthday with Maya Angelou, which I take pride in, for she is a great poet and author herself, her passion for writing is something I share with her also.
Growing up, I had the privilege of having both of my parents in my life and a stable upbringing in which I was surrounded by family and friends constantly. Every need was provided and my parents worked to give me any want or desires that were within their means to gift and that I earned. Much of my family foundation is built on faith which has given me a discipline and practice that has allowed me to discover and build my spiritual self. My mother has been my biggest spiritual teacher and has taught me many things in regards to prayer and other lifelong wisdom that aides me every day. As I grew older and my understanding of the world expanded, I took an interest in politics and worldly news that allowed me to excel in American literature, philosophy/ethics, and higher learning.
From that, my passion in writing bloomed and I found what my true calling was; I wished to create and write for a living and knew it was what made me happiest. My only wish is for me to bring about positive change for others both near and far and leave a lasting legacy that contributes to the overall wellbeing and joy of others.