Having a plan is crucial. Whether it’s packing for a vacation, getting all of your Christmas shopping done in time, or placing your child for adoption. As time passes, it has become easier for expectant mothers to be in charge of their pregnancies and adoption choices. Making a plan for adoption will help you feel more empowered and in control of your circumstances.
At a glance, an adoption plan details every step as you embark on the adoption process, like who your adoption expert will be, the type of adoption you feel comfortable with, the family you want your baby to go to, etc. A lot of thought should be put into this, so take your time in making your adoption plan.
Do not fret! Your adoption experts at Adoption Choices of New York will work with you on making the best possible plan for you and your baby. In our last blog post, we talked about the questions you might have when placing your baby for adoption. This week, we’re going to help you consolidate a plan. It will be a good resource for you and your adoption experts to refer to as you move further along in the adoption journey.
The First Step: Choose the Right Adoption Agency
When choosing the right adoption agency for you, remember that they will be the ones who will stay with you before, during, and after the adoption process has been completed. So it is pivotal that you select an agency that lives up to your standards. Here are some factors you should take into consideration:
- They work with your best interest in mind, and do everything according to your needs and wants.
- You can contact them 24/7 with all your concerns.
- Every adoptive family is screened and has had their background checked to ensure that it will be a safe environment for your baby.
- Adoption experts are licensed and certified in counseling and providing professional support, whether it’s about adoption or your mental health.
Once you know that adoption is the path you want to take, the first thing you should do is to contact an adoption expert at Adoption Choices of New York. Our staff is highly qualified to take you on this journey. Our website makes it easy to get connected to an expert. There is also an option for us to call you. After you have been connected to the right person, he or she will provide confidential and personal guidance about the outcome you want and how you want to achieve that goal.
If you have any questions, do not be afraid to ask. Our website provides answers to some potential questions, but feel free to ask your adoption expert about any other concerns. Keep in mind that reaching out for professional help does not lock you into the adoption process. You always have the right to opt-out of the process, or to choose another adoption agency.
The Second Step: Think about Adoption Style and Adoptive Family
We’ve discussed many times the different adoption style: open, semi-open, and closed. There is no right or wrong answer, all of them offer benefits and drawbacks. The main difference between the three is the amount of contact you will have with your baby after the placement. It is up to you to decide what you think will be best for both you and your baby.
The right to decide on an adoptive family will always reside with you. Your adoption experts will compile a portfolio of families who fit your adoption plan and philosophy. In order for your expert to be the most efficient, you should decide on some qualities that you want a potential adoptive family to exhibit. Here are some characteristics you should think about:
- Do you want your baby to go to a couple who is waiting on their first child or a family who already has children?
- Where do you want your child to grow up? Do you prefer a family living in the city, the countryside, or suburbs?
- What socio-economic and education level of parents would you feel comfortable leaving your baby with?
- How much contact do you want during and after the adoption process?
You might feel that because you are placing your child, you do not have the power to say where the child should go. That is not true at all. You are the mother and your input will always be important.
The Third Step: The Hospital Stay
Considering the amount of time you will be spending at the hospital prior to, during, and after birth, your hospital stay is one of the most important things you go over while making your adoption plan. Your adoption experts will help you with the details, however, in general, there are a few things you should think about and have questions prepared about:
- The type of birth you want to have.
- Who will be with you during the birth?
- Who will get to visit you after birth?
- How much time, if any, do you want to spend with the baby?
- Do you want to see the adoptive family after the delivery?
If you feel uncertain about any aspect of the hospital stay, it is best to consult your adoption expert and attorney. They will be the best resource for emotional as well as professional legal support.
The Fourth Step: Counseling
There is no doubt that you will face emotional turbulence during your adoption journey. While seeking out counseling is not a requirement, it is a wonderful asset for you to regain your emotional strength before and after placement. The adoption experts at Adoption Choices of New York can assist you in finding the appropriate support system for you to heal. Also, check out the article, Speak Your Feelings: Birth Mother Counseling and Support Groups. It further delves into the resources available to birth mothers.
The Fifth Step: Making Your Plan for Adoption
Making an adoption plan will take a lot of energy and courage. Remember, you are brave and powerful. Do not worry too much. Rely on your adoption experts for any questions you might have. We are here for the sake of your happiness, and we will work hard to help you achieve that happiness, no matter the circumstances. The last step is to live your best life.
Adoption Choices of New York
For more information on adoption or if you are currently in the process of adopting a baby and have any questions or concerns, feel free to contact, Adoption Choices of New York.
About the Author
Lisa Truong is an undergraduate journalism major at the University of Denver. She is minoring in writing and Chemistry. She has been commended by professors for her news stories as well as creative writing.
During her freshman year, her essay “See Ya on the Other Side” was displayed at a writing exhibition sponsored by the University of Denver. That essay later went on to be published in Many Voices One DU, a book also sponsored by the university.
Lisa frequently volunteers to be a leader at the Daniels School of Business for their quarterly Ethics Boot Camp where students learn about the importance of character in business. In her free time, Lisa enjoys watching animated movies with her mother, listening to music, going for bike rides, and eating breakfast food.
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Sources:
Adoption Choices of Colorado Team. “How To Create An Adoption Plan.” Adoption Choices of Colorado, October 20, 2017. https://www.adoptionchoices.org/how-to-create-an-adoption-plan/.
American Adoptions, Inc. “‘What Does Adoption Mean to a Child?”.” American Adoptions – Start Your Adoption Today with this Adoption Plan Template. Accessed November 16, 2019. https://www.americanadoptions.com/pregnant/adoption_plan_how_to_make_one.
Truong, Lisa. “Speak Your Feelings: Birth Mother Counseling and Support Groups.” Adoption Choices of New York, August 31, 2019. https://www.adoptionchoicesofnewyork.org/speak-your-feelings-birth-mother-support/.
