Grief vs. Depression After Adoption Finalization
By Kaitlyn Chrisemer
After finding out you’re having an unplanned pregnancy, creating an adoption plan, and finalizing the adoption, you may feel drained. You might be grieving your child. It’s okay to grieve your baby after placing them for adoption. Putting a baby up for adoption is a difficult decision made out of love. It forces birth mothers to place the baby’s needs above their own and prioritize the child’s well-being.
After the baby is born and the adoption is finalized, you may wonder what your feelings mean. It can be difficult to know the difference between grief and depression. Some people express that they feel grief is quite like short-term depression. Adoption Choices of New York wants to help you through this trying time. Our NYC adoption agencies can inform and support you throughout your journey after placing your baby for adoption.
Understanding Your Feelings After Adoption
After giving birth and finalizing your adoption, you probably feel many different emotions. It can feel like you’re constantly doing or planning something during the adoption process. After giving birth, you may be suddenly left with extra time to yourself to think things over. Experiencing so many different feelings can be hard to know what you’re truly feeling. You might not be sure how you’re doing overall.
You should actively take time and work through your feelings during this time. Then, if you feel comfortable, you should talk to your loved ones about your emotions. Talking to others about your feelings can help you to better understand your emotions while also being supported by your loved ones.
There are other methods if you don’t have anyone you’re comfortable talking to about these sensitive feelings and topics. For example, you can journal and write down your feelings throughout the day. Looking back on what you’ve written can help you determine patterns in your emotions and see what you’re feeling most.
Additionally, if you feel you would benefit from talking to a professional, Adoption Choices of New York can help. We have counselors you can talk to who will help you work through your emotions. They can help you create a plan moving forward and determine if you need any more help or treatment.
How to Know if You’re Depressed
Grief is considered a natural reaction to loss, while depression is a clinical condition that can become fatal. Both conditions are unique to each individual and can have similar presenting symptoms. However, depression is far more severe, serious, and prolonged. If your negative feelings move away from focusing on the loss and become more general and persistent, seek help.
To be diagnosed with depression, you must be experiencing a certain amount of symptoms consistently over time. Diagnosis of clinical depression can also only be made by a medical professional. While grief isn’t normally treated with medication, depression can become deadly if left untreated. If you think you may be depressed, contact your physician or a mental health provider.
Postpartum depression (PPD) is often discussed concerning women raising their babies. However, it’s biological. The postpartum period is generally between four and six weeks, but PPD can develop a year after birth. During postpartum, changes to your brain occur, making you feel anxious, sad, hopeless, and tired.
This can make it difficult to take care of yourself during this difficult time. Hopefully, your loved ones will understand the biological nature of PPD if you’re experiencing these emotions. Some may discount birth mothers’ feelings because they aren’t raising the child they birthed, but it’s the same biological process. Don’t let anyone invalidate your feelings because you decided to adopt out your baby.
Women who experience postpartum depression have a higher risk of developing major depression later on. Treatment can include hormone therapy, counseling, and/or antidepressants. If you think you may be experiencing postpartum depression, reach out to our NYC adoption agencies for assistance.
How Adoption Choices of New York can Help
If you’re looking for help at any point in your adoption journey, we can help. We have adoption agencies in Albany, Rochester, Buffalo, and NYC. In addition, we can help with any adoption needs anywhere in the state of New York. Remember that you are not alone in this.
Adoption Choices of New York is available to assist with your adoption plan. Call us, text us, or email us; we are here for you!
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