Can I have a family after placing a baby for adoption?

By Blessing E. Ikhimokpa

The birth mother could have placed the birth child up for adoption at any time in their life. Once they became pregnant, it wasn’t planned. They could have decided they were putting a baby up for adoption. Adoption can happen anytime in the child’s life. Just because they weren’t placed up for adoption after birth, that doesn’t mean the birth mother couldn’t have a family after placing a baby for adoption. At Adoption Choices of New York, we’ll answer questions you may have if you’re wondering whether you can have a family after the adoption. We’ll help you understand how you’ll be able to do that.

Why would the birth mother place their child up for adoption just to start a family later on?

At the time of the unplanned pregnancy, the birth mother wasn’t ready to start a family. Now that a couple of years have passed. They have made a choice to start a family. The birth mother could have placed the birth child up for adoption for any reason. Some of them are that:

• The birth mother wasn’t ready to start a family
• This was an unplanned pregnancy
• They decided they wanted to place the child up for adoption instead
• They didn’t want kids at the time
• The birth mother weren’t financially ready for a family

Will I be able to start a family after adoption?

You can start a family at any time just because you weren’t ready for kids when you were placing your baby for adoption. Doesn’t mean you won’t ever be ready. At the time, having kids wasn’t something you wanted. But now it is. Depending on the type of adoption chosen. You’ll be able to have a relationship with the birth child. 

If you live in Albany, New York, and are wondering whether you’ll be able to start a family. After placing a birth child up for adoption in the past. You can contact adoption agencies in Albany.

Will the birth child I placed up for adoption be jealous of the family I’m starting?

Depending on the relationship you created with the birth child. The birth child should understand why they were placed up for adoption. They should know that you weren’t ready to start a family then. But now you are, and if the birth child would like to be a part of their life. They could if they wanted. 

Whether the child will be jealous of the new family depends on the birth child. Jealousy stems from wanting something you don’t have. But if the birth mother is in the birth child’s life. The birth child shouldn’t feel jealousy, especially if the adoptive parent (s) have other adoptive children as well. 

At Adoption Choices of New York, we offer counseling if needed. If the birth child finds themself becoming jealous that you’ve started a family. After placing them up for adoption in the past. Then, if needed, the birth child would request counseling. If this is you and you live in New York City, New York. You can contact adoption agencies in NYC, and they’ll point you in the right direction. 

Will I feel guilty for starting a family after I’ve placed my birth child up for adoption?

You might feel guilty because you’ll wonder why you weren’t ready to start a family then when you were pregnant with the first child. But you shouldn’t feel guilty for making a decision that needed to be made. Based on your circumstances. Never feel guilty for deciding to start a family when you’re ready. You weren’t ready to become a parent. But now you are, and the first child should understand that.

Finding you feel guilty over the adoption process? Don’t worry. At adoption agencies NYC, we have counselors dealing with birth mothers like you. You’re in expert hands. 

What is adoption guilt?

Adoption guilt is the guilt birth mothers might feel after placing a birth child up for adoption. They’ll wonder if by placing the child up for adoption, they’re giving the child up. They might feel guilt if, after some time, the birth mother starts a family. The birth mother will doubt whether they’re capable since they placed their birth child up for adoption before. They’ll wonder how this time will differ from the last. Wonder if, when they start a family, they’ll be adopting out my baby later on.

Can the adopted child have a relationship with the family I’m starting?

This depends on the birth child themselves. If the relationship between the birth mother and the birth child was great. The birth child might want to meet the new family. Otherwise, the birth child might pass on the opportunity altogether since the birth child was an unplanned pregnancy. They might feel jealousy towards the birth child that was planned. But, as previously mentioned, this depends on the relationship between the birth mother and the birth child.

If you’re wondering whether you’ll be able to start a family after adoption, you can contact your local adoption agency. Adoption Choices of New York is available to assist with your adoption plan. Call us, text us, or email us; we are here for you!

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