Common Adoption Misconceptions About New York Birth Mothers
When it comes to adoption, there are a lot of different moving parts that allow the journey to be done correctly and successfully. There are types of adoption to choose from depending on what your individual wants and needs are. As the birth mother, you have absolute control over the entire process. Despite all of the information out there about adoption, birth mothers, and pregnancy adoption options, there are some adoption misconceptions about New York birth mothers floating around. At Adoption Choices of New York, we strive to give you the best care no matter what stage you’re at. Ask us anything! We’re here to help you.
What is a Birth Mother?
First and foremost, defining a birth mother is incredibly important in the language of adoption. You become a birth mother once your child has been placed with the adoptive family. Throughout the adoption process prior to giving birth, you are an expectant mother, pregnant woman, or pregnant mother. You can refer to yourself as any of the three mentioned or decide on a different variation. Adoption Choices of New York will stick to a general term, but you can always ask to be referred to in your preferred manner.
Once you give birth, though, you are officially a birth mother. Some women change that label, too, and that’s perfectly fine! Alternatives to the term birth mother can include biological mother, natural mothers, and so on. Changing the label is mostly due to some women feeling it insinuates the relationship ends after the child is born. Depending on the type of adoption you choose, you may decide you like one of the other terms better or just stick with birth mother. Once again, it’s up to you!
Are Birth Mothers Paid For Having A Baby?
Absolutely not! Sadly this is another one of those common adoption misconceptions. Adoption Choices of New York and all other adoption agencies in New York abide by state law, meaning the exchange of money for a child is illegal. This idea can come from the fact that some adoptive parents help out financially with prenatal doctor visits and other maternity-related purchases. Most agencies offer financial assistance to expectant women or can help you fill out forms for government-assisted programs for women who are pregnant.
Adoptive families are allowed to contribute as much or as little as they’re able to financially, but no, they are not paying you for your baby. Situations arise where you may find yourself unable to balance all the expenses that come with pregnancy, and that is where adoptive families can step in and help, but it is not required or guaranteed when you begin your adoption journey.
Can Birth Mothers Change Their Mind Whenever They Want?
In New York, birth mothers have up to thirty days to retract the signed document stating they wave their parental rights. So, yes, they can change their mind, but there is a time limit, and in the state of New York, you cannot sign away parental rights until after delivery. If at any point, you want to regain custody of your child after the thirty-day mark, you will have to go through court.
Can Birth Mothers See The Child At Will?
Open adoptions can be tricky to navigate, but that is why your adoption professional will help you navigate during that stage of your adoption plan. No, birth mothers in New York cannot just show up at random. You will decide what you want your open adoption to look like. That includes deciding the amount of communication, what type, and how often. Scheduled visits are pre-planned and have to be agreed upon by both parties. Showing up unannounced and at random can be harmful to your child emotionally and cause a rift in the relationship between yourself and the adoptive family. You waved your parental rights when your child was placed. That means the adoptive family can limit or end visitations if they feel you are a threat or are not following the guidelines of your adoption plan.
Do Birth Mothers Love Their Child?
Of course! Placing your child for adoption does not mean that you don’t love your child. Choosing adoption is a sign of the purest form of love. Knowing you cannot or don’t want to raise your child but want to bring life into this world is a selfless act that requires extreme courage. But, even if you decide to have a closed adoption, that does not negate the love you feel in your heart. You wanted to give your child the best, and for some women, that means placing their child up for adoption.
Adoption Misconceptions About Birth Mothers in New York Can Cause Confusion
Are you a pregnant woman considering placing your child up for adoption in New York? Contact us at Adoption Choices of New York. We can help you understand your rights as a birth mother and answer any questions you may have. Remember, you’re not in this alone. Let us guide you through your adoption journey.
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