Can a Birth Mother Change Her Mind About Adoption in New York?
Choosing to place your child up for adoption is one of the toughest decisions a pregnant woman has to make. The thought process behind this decision can take time, especially if you are unsure. There are emotions from all angles and questions about the adoption process and its effects later down the line. One question that can arise is: can a birth mother change her mind about adoption? The short answer is yes. There are many facets revolving around this question, though, and expectant mothers who are still uncertain can always talk to an adoption specialist or counselor about their concerns.
If you’re an expectant mother in New York grappling with the decision of adoption and curious about your rights we can help at Adoption Choices of New York. If you have any questions about reversal of parental rights in New York or ending adoption before placement and are still considering adoption there’s nothing wrong with being educated! The laws are different in each state and New York has specific time limits for birth mothers after placement.
Is it Wrong to Change My Mind about Adoption?
Absolutely not! Adoption is all about what is best for your child. This does not mean you are completely detached from your child or don’t go through the same emotional struggles any other mother does during pregnancy or after birth. Raising the question if adoption is truly the right choice can be startling, but you are within your rights as the birth mother to change your mind. There is nothing wrong morally or otherwise with realizing adoption is not the right decision for you or your child. You will not be the first or the last birth mother to change their mind.
What Happens if I Change Your Mind about Adoption before Birth?
Legally, nothing happens. You are the mother of that child and have every right to do what you feel is right in your heart for your baby. In New York, it is illegal to surrender parental rights until after the child is born. If you decide that adoption is not the right choice before birth, there is nothing that needs to be signed or documented. This is referred to as a disrupted adoption, and the adoptive parents will be notified. You may feel guilt for the parties involved, but that is okay. At the end of the day, the choice is yours. You have every right to decide you are the best caretaker for your child.
What if I’m Not Sure about the Adoptive Parents?
Another question that can pop up during adoption discussions is: can a birth mother change her mind about adoption in regards to the potential adoptive parents? Yes, you can! If you’re unsure at all about the adoptive family you have chosen, speak to your adoption professional right away! After all, this is the family who is going to be raising your child. You want what is best for him or her, and sometimes things may surface later in the adoption process that have you questioning your choice. There is no harm in being cautious. These concerns are best addressed the moment you have an inkling of doubt in both cases. If a change is needed to be made regarding placement, it is best to consult your adoption caseworker and do it as early as possible.
Can I Change My Mind about Adoption after Birth?
Yes, but if you have already absolved your parental rights, there is a process you will have to go through, depending on what state you live in. In New York, you have up to thirty days to revoke the parental custody abolishment paperwork to regain custody of your child. Depending on the adoption agency you choose, you may have custody returned by the adoption agency within the time period, while other adoption agencies may want proof that you are the best choice to receive custody of your child. Adoption agencies can legally challenge the reversal, and then a judge will have to take the case over.
Before you decide on what adoption agency to go through, it may be in your best interest to ask questions in case you change your mind. Knowing what steps will happen afterwards is a good way to prepare on the off chance the situation arises. This may also help you make a choice on which adoption agency to work with, if you are still considering a few different adoption agencies.
What if I’m Unsure about Adoption throughout the Adoption Process?
Adoption journeys are different for every expectant mother. Feelings, emotions and doubt may trapeze up and down during the adoption process. The best thing to do for yourself is to talk to someone. Either your adoption professional, a birth mother who has been through the adoption process or adoption-focused counselors. Educating yourself on all aspects, including the emotional rollercoaster that can happen during the adoption process, can help you understand and decipher what you’re feeling. Feelings of uncertainty may happen. All you can do is trust in yourself and follow your intuition or gut feeling.
If you’re considering adoption in the New York area, or have more questions about your rights as a birth mother, contact Adoption Choices of New York. We will provide you with more information about adoption, birth mother rights and different options aiming to support expectant mothers and birth mothers. This is your decision for your child. No matter what you decide, in the end, you are doing so with love as the driving force.
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