5 Questions to Ask Yourself to Decide if Giving your Baby up for Adoption is the Best Choice for You
Putting your child up for adoption can be a tough decision. But for many pregnant women, it is the best option for their personal circumstances. If abortion or raising a child both don’t seem like choices that are best for you, then maybe giving your baby up for adoption is the best choice.
If you have been trying to figure out what is the right choice for you, try answering some of the questions below. These may put you on the right path and help you decide if, like many other women, putting your baby up for adoption is best for both you and your child.
At Adoption Choices of New York we believe in empowering you in your adoption journey if that is the path you choose to take.
Choosing Adoption in New York State
- Do I want a Child Right Now — or Ever?
Contrary to popular belief, many women don’t see themselves raising children in the future. If you are one of the women who falls under this category, or if you just do not want a child at this stage in your life, adoption could definitely be a good option for you. If you cannot imagine yourself taking care of a baby and making the large sacrifices that are necessary to become a parent, it is perfectly valid to give your child to an adoptive family who is ready to take on the responsibility.
People may try to make you feel guilty for not wanting to be a parent, but we understand that choosing adoption in New York State and making the choice to give your child to a home where they will be wholeheartedly wanted is better for both you and your child.
- Am I Ready to Prioritize a Baby for the Rest of Their Life?
When you decide to become a parent, much of your life then starts to revolve around your child. You will no longer be able to go on vacation without a second thought, stay out late without finding someone to watch your child, or even leave the house in the morning as easily as you used to. Although many parents still think it is worth it, this is not the case for everyone.
If you feel like you would resent not being able to live life as freely as you used to, then maybe giving your baby up for adoption is the best choice. By providing a waiting family with the child they have been hoping for, you would be able to benefit everyone involved — yourself, the adoptive family, and your child.
- Do I have the Resources and Support necessary to Raise a Child?
Children require a lot of resources from their parents — both financial and emotional. That is why it is helpful to have as much support as you can, whether it is from a partner, your parents, or from other people in your community. If you do not have the necessary resources or support however, it can be extremely difficult to raise a child. Especially if you are a single parent. There are several aspects of parenthood that you would have to figure out how to provide such as:
- Childcare for your child when you are not able to watch them
- Clothing, food, and other necessities
- Infant necessities such as a stroller, crib, and a carseat
- The cost of extracurricular activities and school supplies
If you feel like your head would barely be above water while providing for your child, or that you would be unable to make it work at all, adoption in New York State is a perfectly valid choice that could be perfect for your circumstances. If you are worried about the financial costs of your pregnancy and birth before you give your child up for adoption, we have resources available.
- Do I have Plans for My Education or Career that Could be Affected by Raising a Baby?
Many women have dreams about graduating, either from highschool or university, and about moving high up their career ladder. Although many mothers are able to balance caring for children and completing these dreams, raising a baby can make the process more difficult, especially if the pregnancy is unplanned.
If you feel like raising a baby at this point in your life will interfere with career or educational goals, you may need to figure out how important these aspects of your life are to you. If you think you would regret having to put these aspects of your future on the back burner, adoption might be a good option for you.
- Will my Child have a More Stable Life with an Adoptive Family?
If you feel like you won’t be able to provide a stable life for a child at this point in your life because of finances, lack of childcare support, or any other reasons, you may not be ready to take on such a large commitment. There are plenty of families who are waiting to add a baby to their family. You may have feelings of guilt associated with adoption and think that you are failing your baby, but it is actually quite the opposite. If you know that you are not able to take on the responsibility of raising a child, giving them to a family who is ready is a great decision for your baby and for you.
Giving Up Your Baby for Adoption in New York
Overall, it is okay to give your child up for adoption if you know it is the best choice. You are not selfish or unfair. You just understand what you can and cannot handle at this point in your life. If these questions have led you to believe that giving your baby up for adoption is the best choice for you, feel free to reach out to Adoption Choices of New York for any more adoption specific questions you may have. We can also help you set up an adoption plan.
About the Author: Alexandra Georgiton is a fourth-year student at the University of Cincinnati studying Rhetoric and Professional Writing, and is receiving certification in Copyediting and Publishing. She has been passionate about the English language for her entire life, and reading and writing have always been her favorite hobbies. She enjoys professional writing and editing because she loves to use her talent and love of writing to make a difference in the world.